De-Influencing

Couple of days of ago, I watched a YouTube video that made me re-realize the front we put to social media platforms. The YouTuber talked about “de-influencing” and opened up on the most vulnerable sides of her life. She talked about how everybody on social media tends to create a curated, often fake reality. She mentioned how she has been single for almost a decade now, how she struggles with body dysmorphia and self-image, and how she has no connection to her mother. On social media, she doesn’t tend to show these sides of herself – perhaps because most of the individuals who consume content just mindlessly scroll or maybe because she taught nobody would be influenced and find it relatable. The thing is, on social media, we have the power to create whatever life we want; we can fabricate a façade of who we want to be. 

Think about it: most of the influencers we follow have been creating these picture-perfect lives for so long now. They are always at luxurious, expensive dates with outfits that costs hundreds of thousands of dollars surrounded by gorgeous men or women, driving the most expensive cars, travelling to everybody’s dream destinations, lounging at exclusive high-end hotels and cities, spending time with their perfect friends. Breathtaking bodies that are created by endless gym streaks and perfectly balanced healthy foods. A flawless life. Don’t you think it is too perfect to be true? 

What we don’t see – or don’t always realize - is the reality behind these influencers’ lives. In the end, people choose which photo to post after taking countless shots. A gym photo showing of their immaculate bodies could be from a 5-minute workout or even from trying out the workout set. The “healthy” meals they post could very well be just a single meal of the day and the rest of the day they could be eating junk food. The relationships they display could be strategic, perhaps even business related, rather than genuine connections, The cars they’re drive might be rented and the outfits they wear could be sponsored by the companies for free. I say “could” because we don’t really know the truth behind any of it, and more importantly we shouldn’t feel bad or keep ourselves accountable for not living up to those standards. 

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We don’t have to feel bad because we aren’t going to the gym consistently, or because we don’t have our dream bodies. We shouldn’t guilty if we indulge in fast food more than we’d like, or if our relations aren’t as strong or picture-perfect as the ones we see online. It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparison, but we have to remind ourselves that what we see is not always the reality. It is full of illusion. 

We have to realize that influencers, or anybody who posts on social media, have the ability to whatever version of life they wish. I’m not claiming that every influencer we see on social media are faking their life, but we have to consider the possibility that a lot of what we see is far from reality. When we accept this, we can free ourselves from the pressure of measuring our worth against these constructed ideals.